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No, I'm not referring to the upcoming film adapted from the Marvel Comics book series directed by Kenneth Branagh and staring Chirs Hemsworth, Sir Anthony Hopkins, and Natalie Portman (which is already getting overwhelmingly positive reviews even before the film officially gets released in the United States). I'm talking about one that is shamelessly trying to cash in on the action from the Asylum, the same studio that brought you such "mockbusters" like Transmorphers, Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus, a modern remake of Moby Dick, and an adaptation of Sherlock Holmes that had Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's famous detective up against his evil mad scientist brother and his army of mechanical dinosaurs.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you The Almighty Thor (courtesy of MTV's Splash Page):


Now, you're probably thinking this film has zero chance of ever competing against, or even being better than, the big budget one from Paramount and Marvel Studios (and you'd be right), but consider this: not only does it have former pro-wrestling champion Kevin Nash as Odin AND Richard Grieco as Loki...it's got Thor...fighting crappy CGI dragons...with a friggin' UZI!!!



I mean, DAMN! Not even Stan Lee and Jack Kirby had the balls to make the Norse God of Thunder do that! (Besides, somebody else already gave Thor a BFG during those wacky 1990s):



Admit it: you're just dying to see this in all it's "so bad it's AWESOME!" glory, aren't you?




After the critical praise both Dan Slott and Marcos Martin received for Amazing Spider-Man #655, their follow-up in issue #656 was, without question, going to pale in comparison. The question is, would Slott and Martin, in having Spidey face the new villain Massacre that they introduced in the last two pages of issue #655, get near to matching the quality of that previous issue, much less be a good comic.
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 What do you get when you take Superman, take the musical score of the Superman movie serial from the 1940s, portray it in a style that seems like a hybrid of the old Flescher Studios cartoons and Ren and Stimpy, and with a modern sensibility?  You get this very excellent short by Disney Animator--and die-hard Superman fan--Robb Pratt, of course:


In a sea of very--and I mean VERY--bad commercials this year that aired during Super Bowl XLV, the Force is STILL strong with this ad for the 2012 Volkswagen Passat (which first showed up on YouTube days before):


Seriously, having to endure stuff like people being beaned with PepsiMAX cans (in two separate spots no less), Joan Rivers being the "new" GoDaddy.com girl, Chevy making fun of the elderly in the most clichéd manner possible, Groupon trivializing the plight of Tibet, and creepy office-worker licking and snorting Doritos Cheese dust, it was refreshing to see such a simple, effective, heart-warming ad that was not only funny, but which touched the inner child and geek within all of us.

The Runner-Up was, interestingly enough, another car commercial.  The only reason why this didn't "win" was because it did a much better job selling the city it took place in than the actual product being advertised (seriously, when you can take what is arguably one of the worst major metropolitan cities in the United States and somehow make it synonymous with the American Spirit, you're definitely doing something right):



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Just in case you don't have 9 to 10 hours to spare, a guy named Tim McGovern decided to condense and perform Peter Jackson's film adaptation of J.R.R. Tolkien's classic trilogy by himself.  Forewarning: there are spoilers. :p

 

My New Year's Resolutions for 2011




1. Exercise at least three times a week.  Course I have to figure exactly what form of exercise to do, but I am open to suggestions.  The only caveat is that must not involve Richard Simmons in any way shape or form.  My ears wouldn’t be able to take it.

 

2. Read at least one good book a week.  Fortunately, I have a good sizeable list to work with.  Unfortunately, I have to figure out which book to start with.  Perhaps I can put up ten books at random from this list and have folks vote on which one I should start on?  Or if you really want to agonize me, put up a possible book for me to read.

 

3. Engage in a conversation in which there are no time-constraints at least once a month.  And not just texting or talking on the phone with someone.  I also mean actually sitting down with someone and having a genuine face-to-face conversation like a normal human being--preferably someone I haven’t seen in a long time, or even someone I just met. Not that texting or posting online isn’t fun, but I do want to rest my fingers from time to time.

 

4. Write down one thing I have learned from Church every week, and one thing only. At least this way, I hope to grow spiritually without having to nitpick something in return.  Not to mention try and put what I learned into practice.

 

5. Get the required 8 hours of sleep.  I expect this one to be especially difficult, since I tend to be a night person and don’t particularly like getting up some mornings.  But at least it will beat getting tired mid-afternoon. 

 

6. Finish and then publish my first novel.  This is something I’ve been making a New Year’s resolution about practically every year.  This time, much of what I have is written down, but I definitely need to organize it into some coherent shape.  I think it’s also a pretty good premise, but right now, I feel it’s in danger of becoming moldy if I down get it out of my head and completely on paper.  Course sending it out for publication is another story altogether.

 

7. Re-learn Spanish.  Might as well brush up on a language I supposedly already should know.  That way, I can then go on to try my hand at some other new language to clutter up my brain.  I was thinking either Latin or Japanese, which are two other languages I've tried to learn in the past.

 

8. Stop tying so hard to impress others. Because not only does it make me look foolish, but I find I’m not really good at it.  Besides, one of my biggest pet-peeves is someone who feels they have always have to be the center of attention and that they have to come out on top in every conversation.   You know, the ones who, after hearing a story then say “I can top that”?  And why should I be something that I myself find annoying?  This also means being sincere and speaking more from the heart, or at least the gut.

 

9.  Make a “to do” list every day.  Even though I like to think of myself as being flexible, I also tend to be more disorganized than most, which makes me more prone to procrastination than I already am.  So in this case, I can allow myself to have a set of personal instructions for myself to follow.  Besides, I have a habit of making lists anyway, so might as well put it to good use.    

 

10.  This one I leave for you.  Because this resolution is your own.  After all, I can't be the only one to have some fun now, can I?